Monday, April 11, 2011

Puppy Love

Hello my blogging friends. It has been far too long and I will no longer promise to be back on here more often to write because it just never seems to happen. However I will write today and tell you about my job. Its not new since I have been doing it now since October but its new to you!! I am a pet guardian at a pet resort. What is a pet guardian you ask? Well first let me explain what a pet resort is.

The pet resort I work at is one that offers a variety of services to our families. We offer boarding. The dogs/cats check in, get a check in exam, are shown to their room and then taken outside for playtime or a potty break. Grooming is where our puppies or kitties go for everything from a basic bath and brush out to a completely new do. Training is another service we offer. Got a puppy who nips or chews? We'll help with that. Got an older dog with aggression issues? Yeah we can help with that too. Then there is doggie daycare. Dogs are dropped off anytime during business hours and they are taken outside to play with all their friends.

I work a variety of positions there. Some days I work in the front where I greet parents, answer phones, make reservations and welcome out 4-legged guests as they arrive. Other days I work in the back where I care for the animals. This includes cleaning their rooms every morning, feeding, bathing, taking them outside, dishes, laundry, making treats, giving medicine and pretty much anything the dogs/cats need. Then there is daycare!! My favorite. I am outside with the dogs for 6 hours playing, correcting and yes helping to modify problem behavior.

I am also currently going to school to become a certified dog trainer myself. I have found my true love as far as work goes and I couldn't be happier.

~Darlin~

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Starting over...

Well hello again my blogging friends. It has been a VERY long time since I wrote here, other than to say I was going to start again, but I hope for this to become a weekly, if not daily habit for me again.

A lot of things have changed in the last 3 months. I lost my house, my car, my job and my boyfriend of 5 years....in fact I locked my dog up cause if she ran away I would literally be living a country song!! On a positive note I got a new job that is not in a bar. I now work at a pet resort and spend my days taking care of dogs and cats. It really is the perfect job for me because anyone who knows me knows I LOVE animals. I have a beautiful little one bedroom apartment. Its tight when I have my kids, which is Sun, Mon, Tues and every other weekend, but I am blessed to have children who understand that I had to start over and that this is where I have to do it. They really make the best out of this tight situation and never allow me to feel guilty about it. My relationship with my ex-boyfriend is now stronger than it ever was while we were together. We spend a lot of time with each other now, but its more relaxing because we are not in a relationship and there is no sex involved. I will have a vehicle again soon thanks to a very good friend of mine. He purchased a van and had new tires put on it and a tune up just so he could give it to me. He refuses to let me pay him anything even though I plan on setting aside what I can so I can pay him when I have it.

I have been blessed with quite a few angels in my life lately and I have truly come to realize who my real friends are. So many people always claimed to be my friend, said they would always have my back but when it came right down to it they disappeared. But at least now I know who I can truly put my confidence in.

My daughter has now started her own blog so make sure and check it out guys. Her and I are going to try and pick a topic for us to both write about once a week. I think it will be entertaining to see how our opinions vary. Her blog is www.storyofablackrose.blogspot.com

~Darlin~

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

I've Been Slackin

Hey everyone...I can't believe its been over a year since the last time I posted anything. Life got so mundane and drab I just lost my zest. But there has been some major changes and I will be back in here in full force regaling all of you with my new tales of life.

Stay tuned.....

~Darlin~

Thursday, August 6, 2009

The Lost One Returns

I know that is has been quite some time since the last time I wrote but I have a very good reason for returning to my mindless musings. Almost 15 years ago my oldest daughter's dad walked out of our lives. This past Thursday he returned. Now before everyone gets all excited and starts telling me what a jerk he is and the he shouldn't be allowed to see her let me fill you in on a little back story.

We were kids. We were perfect together. No one could make me smile and laugh the way Phil could. He always brought me up when I was down and we always believed that we would be together forever. But then the baby came and with it the responsibilities of being adults. It was great at first. He was a wonderful dad. But when he told me he wanted to drop out of school and get a full-time job that is when things started to go downhill. I was a high school dropout myself and I didn't want Phil to make the same mistake. He was a very talented football player and a good student. But he kept insisting and I finally said that if he did we were done. He was young and immature and I know now that I was putting too much pressure on him.

We crumbled under all of it. After we broke up he still came to see her. He doted on her like any good dad would. Enter Herrold. My future husband and the one thing that Phil could not get past. It killed him to see Herrold with me and his daughter. My family referred to Herrold as "Daddy Herrold" and Phil could not handle feeling like he was being replaced and made the decision to leave. Now I know that is not right but I also know that he was a kid and that I did not do anything to stop him. In fact maybe I thought our lives would be easier if I didn't have to deal with the jealousy and the arguing. It made me miserable to fight with Phil because I did still love him, regardless of what had happened between us and I did not like to see the pain in his eyes every time he came over. So I let him walk away.

Last week a mutual friend of mine and Phil's called me and ended up coming to visit me at work. We of course talked of Phil and I told him that I had been unable to find him all these years (yes I did look, we told her about him when she was 10). He told me that Phil was one of his "friends" on myspace. I went home and after two days of actively avoiding looking I had to see for myself who he was. I did not click on his page with any intention of contacting him. I guess I just wanted to see what kind of a man my boy had become.

As I clicked through all the pictures, looking at this man whom I had known as a boy my head was filled with all the old memories. I tried to remember fighting with Phil. I tried to remember him being a bad person. But I couldn't. He just wasn't a bad guy. He had just been a kid. So the next thing I knew I had sent him a message.

Skip to Friday night around 10:30pm. We had discussed us meeting before she was told that we were talking. So he sends me a text asking me to meet him. Which I do at a Denny's. I was sick to my stomach the whole drive there. I didn't know what my reaction would be when I saw him. I got out of my truck and saw him leaning against his truck, his back to me. I don't know how I knew it was him. He was twice the size he was when I knew him (muscular not fat) and now had long hair, but I knew it was him. Then he turned around. Seeing his face alone almost brought me to tears. There was the boy I had loved and had a child with all grown up but that impish smile of his hadn't changed a bit. We didn't hug although I think we both had to think about whether or not we were going to and based off the other's actions did not.

To my disappointment he informed me that he now had doubts about whether or not she was his. I wasn't angered by this just disappointed because as he sat across from me all I could see my was little girl. All his facial expressions, the way he bit his lower lip, his posture as he sat and especially his smile all reflected her. I told him that I understood and that we would need to get that done before he could meet her. What I thought would be an hour meeting at the most turned into over 4 hours. After too much coffee and tea (and the fact that I desperately needed a cigarette) we went out to my truck and sat and talked for hours. As I was getting ready to leave I told him I would look into the cost of paternity testing and he said he didn't want to wait and that he was starting to feel like if he could just look into her eyes he would know. So we agreed that he would meet her the next day after I got off of work. I knew she was his and I truly believed that once he saw her all doubt would disappear.

I was right.

I will make another entry tomorrow on their first meeting.

~Darlin~

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Memoirs

I have decided to write my memoirs. I have to admit that I am a bit scared about the whole thing because if I am honest, and I mean truly honest in my writing then half of my family may never speak to me again.

I have an immense amount of wisdom to pass on to other non-educated, non-married, unemployed, mothers but to be completely honest about myself with require some severe brutality when it comes to the truth about my family, who they truly are and how them being the fucked up people they are affected who I have become.

Stay tuned folks...it can only get better (or worse if you're me).

~Darlin~