Darlin's Disposition

Puppy Love

2011-04-11T06:57:00.000-07:00

Hello my blogging friends. It has been far too long and I will no longer promise to be back on here more often to write because it just never seems to happen. However I will write today and tell you about my job. Its not new since I have been doing it now since October but its new to you!! I am a pet guardian at a pet resort. What is a pet guardian you ask? Well first let me explain what a pet resort is.

The pet resort I work at is one that offers a variety of services to our families. We offer boarding. The dogs/cats check in, get a check in exam, are shown to their room and then taken outside for playtime or a potty break. Grooming is where our puppies or kitties go for everything from a basic bath and brush out to a completely new do. Training is another service we offer. Got a puppy who nips or chews? We'll help with that. Got an older dog with aggression issues? Yeah we can help with that too. Then there is doggie daycare. Dogs are dropped off anytime during business hours and they are taken outside to play with all their friends.

I work a variety of positions there. Some days I work in the front where I greet parents, answer phones, make reservations and welcome out 4-legged guests as they arrive. Other days I work in the back where I care for the animals. This includes cleaning their rooms every morning, feeding, bathing, taking them outside, dishes, laundry, making treats, giving medicine and pretty much anything the dogs/cats need. Then there is daycare!! My favorite. I am outside with the dogs for 6 hours playing, correcting and yes helping to modify problem behavior.

I am also currently going to school to become a certified dog trainer myself. I have found my true love as far as work goes and I couldn't be happier.

~Darlin~

Starting over...

2010-10-30T11:41:00.000-07:00

Well hello again my blogging friends. It has been a VERY long time since I wrote here, other than to say I was going to start again, but I hope for this to become a weekly, if not daily habit for me again.

A lot of things have changed in the last 3 months. I lost my house, my car, my job and my boyfriend of 5 years....in fact I locked my dog up cause if she ran away I would literally be living a country song!! On a positive note I got a new job that is not in a bar. I now work at a pet resort and spend my days taking care of dogs and cats. It really is the perfect job for me because anyone who knows me knows I LOVE animals. I have a beautiful little one bedroom apartment. Its tight when I have my kids, which is Sun, Mon, Tues and every other weekend, but I am blessed to have children who understand that I had to start over and that this is where I have to do it. They really make the best out of this tight situation and never allow me to feel guilty about it. My relationship with my ex-boyfriend is now stronger than it ever was while we were together. We spend a lot of time with each other now, but its more relaxing because we are not in a relationship and there is no sex involved. I will have a vehicle again soon thanks to a very good friend of mine. He purchased a van and had new tires put on it and a tune up just so he could give it to me. He refuses to let me pay him anything even though I plan on setting aside what I can so I can pay him when I have it.

I have been blessed with quite a few angels in my life lately and I have truly come to realize who my real friends are. So many people always claimed to be my friend, said they would always have my back but when it came right down to it they disappeared. But at least now I know who I can truly put my confidence in.

My daughter has now started her own blog so make sure and check it out guys. Her and I are going to try and pick a topic for us to both write about once a week. I think it will be entertaining to see how our opinions vary. Her blog is www.storyofablackrose.blogspot.com

~Darlin~

I've Been Slackin

2010-09-01T09:34:00.001-07:00

Hey everyone...I can't believe its been over a year since the last time I posted anything. Life got so mundane and drab I just lost my zest. But there has been some major changes and I will be back in here in full force regaling all of you with my new tales of life.

Stay tuned.....

~Darlin~

The Lost One Returns

2009-08-06T12:20:00.000-07:00

I know that is has been quite some time since the last time I wrote but I have a very good reason for returning to my mindless musings. Almost 15 years ago my oldest daughter's dad walked out of our lives. This past Thursday he returned. Now before everyone gets all excited and starts telling me what a jerk he is and the he shouldn't be allowed to see her let me fill you in on a little back story.

We were kids. We were perfect together. No one could make me smile and laugh the way Phil could. He always brought me up when I was down and we always believed that we would be together forever. But then the baby came and with it the responsibilities of being adults. It was great at first. He was a wonderful dad. But when he told me he wanted to drop out of school and get a full-time job that is when things started to go downhill. I was a high school dropout myself and I didn't want Phil to make the same mistake. He was a very talented football player and a good student. But he kept insisting and I finally said that if he did we were done. He was young and immature and I know now that I was putting too much pressure on him.

We crumbled under all of it. After we broke up he still came to see her. He doted on her like any good dad would. Enter Herrold. My future husband and the one thing that Phil could not get past. It killed him to see Herrold with me and his daughter. My family referred to Herrold as "Daddy Herrold" and Phil could not handle feeling like he was being replaced and made the decision to leave. Now I know that is not right but I also know that he was a kid and that I did not do anything to stop him. In fact maybe I thought our lives would be easier if I didn't have to deal with the jealousy and the arguing. It made me miserable to fight with Phil because I did still love him, regardless of what had happened between us and I did not like to see the pain in his eyes every time he came over. So I let him walk away.

Last week a mutual friend of mine and Phil's called me and ended up coming to visit me at work. We of course talked of Phil and I told him that I had been unable to find him all these years (yes I did look, we told her about him when she was 10). He told me that Phil was one of his "friends" on myspace. I went home and after two days of actively avoiding looking I had to see for myself who he was. I did not click on his page with any intention of contacting him. I guess I just wanted to see what kind of a man my boy had become.

As I clicked through all the pictures, looking at this man whom I had known as a boy my head was filled with all the old memories. I tried to remember fighting with Phil. I tried to remember him being a bad person. But I couldn't. He just wasn't a bad guy. He had just been a kid. So the next thing I knew I had sent him a message.

Skip to Friday night around 10:30pm. We had discussed us meeting before she was told that we were talking. So he sends me a text asking me to meet him. Which I do at a Denny's. I was sick to my stomach the whole drive there. I didn't know what my reaction would be when I saw him. I got out of my truck and saw him leaning against his truck, his back to me. I don't know how I knew it was him. He was twice the size he was when I knew him (muscular not fat) and now had long hair, but I knew it was him. Then he turned around. Seeing his face alone almost brought me to tears. There was the boy I had loved and had a child with all grown up but that impish smile of his hadn't changed a bit. We didn't hug although I think we both had to think about whether or not we were going to and based off the other's actions did not.

To my disappointment he informed me that he now had doubts about whether or not she was his. I wasn't angered by this just disappointed because as he sat across from me all I could see my was little girl. All his facial expressions, the way he bit his lower lip, his posture as he sat and especially his smile all reflected her. I told him that I understood and that we would need to get that done before he could meet her. What I thought would be an hour meeting at the most turned into over 4 hours. After too much coffee and tea (and the fact that I desperately needed a cigarette) we went out to my truck and sat and talked for hours. As I was getting ready to leave I told him I would look into the cost of paternity testing and he said he didn't want to wait and that he was starting to feel like if he could just look into her eyes he would know. So we agreed that he would meet her the next day after I got off of work. I knew she was his and I truly believed that once he saw her all doubt would disappear.

I was right.

I will make another entry tomorrow on their first meeting.

~Darlin~

Memoirs

2009-04-02T14:44:00.000-07:00

I have decided to write my memoirs. I have to admit that I am a bit scared about the whole thing because if I am honest, and I mean truly honest in my writing then half of my family may never speak to me again.

I have an immense amount of wisdom to pass on to other non-educated, non-married, unemployed, mothers but to be completely honest about myself with require some severe brutality when it comes to the truth about my family, who they truly are and how them being the fucked up people they are affected who I have become.

Stay tuned folks...it can only get better (or worse if you're me).

~Darlin~

Great New Book

2009-03-06T08:31:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone. I just finished reading a new book and wanted to help spread the word about it.

First off let me say that I bought this book not only for the title but because the author's name is a combination of my mother's (Diana) and my father's (Joseph). I pay attention to simple signs like that (refer to the chapter titled, Humping the Dinosaur for more on signs) and couldn't wait to get my hands on this book. I bought it yesterday at 3:30pm and finished it this morning at around 9am. Couldn't put it down.

Check it out and please let me know what you think!

~Darlin~

Back to Bartending

2009-01-23T09:53:00.000-08:00

Greetings fellow bloggers. It is Friday and I was to have my first Friday off in over two months. Unfortunately I was just called in to work the night shift. I have not written in quite some time (holidays ya know) and I should update everyone.

As seen in my previous entry I was a waitress the last time I wrote. But as of two months ago I climbed up a few rungs on the hospitality ladder and advanced to the coveted position of bartender. I have not bartended in years and was not up to date on the newest drinks. Piece of Ass, Orgasms, Screaming Orgasms, Purple Penis, Pink Pussy and Sex with an Alligator are just a few of the ridiculous drinks I have been asked to make by adolescent alcohol consumers. Is it just me or are bar patrons desperately infatuated with sex?

Now don't get me wrong...it is my job to concoct whatever beverage a customer would like but there is a new problem arising for bartenders now that everyone believes they are Colin Field (world's most famous bartender), creating drinks that taste more like candy than a true cocktail. Instead of being able to just make a Pink Pussy you must now ask your customer WHICH recipe they would like you to make because there are 5 different versions and if you don't make the one they are expecting they will inevitably send it back saying it doesn't taste right.

Consumers these days don't drink to experience the true flavors that delight your senses when you sip a glass of Evan Williams 23 Year Old Bourbon (averages $350 a bottle). They can't detect the differences between a $5.00 martini and one made with Bombay Sapphire. They drink to get drunk and they want to do it for as little money as possible. Sure we get the guy who comes in and orders a shot of Johnnie Walker Green Label ($30 a shot) but after that first shot, which he slams down not bothering to savor the flavors, he always switches to well whiskey (otherwise known as "rotgut") when his buddies aren't looking and gives me the "wink", whispering that he'll make sure and take care of me if I help keep up his illusion.

I have tried time and time again to bring back the classics: Old Fashion, Golden Cadillac, Gimlet, Sidecar and Harvey Wallbanger. But the kids these days will not have it. One sip of those true taste adventures and their noses wrinkle, tongue comes out and they act as if I just fed them antifreeze. "Ugh! All I taste is alcohol in that", they whine. Isn't that the point? I always thought it was.

Happiness in hamburgers

2008-11-01T19:20:00.000-07:00

Hello all...I recently left that horrible landscaping company. At the time of my departure I was optamistic and full of hope for a new career move. But after three weeks, 54 resumes and only 1 interview I realized that I was in serious danger of not finding a job before funds ran out. I was desperate and scared. Thats when I received a phone call from a friend of mine. He had a friend who owned a small diner and was desperately looking for someone to come work for him. I interviewed with the man and his wife the next day and accepted what I considered to be the lowest I could sink....a waitress position.

I have not been a waitress since I was 17 years old and I really never thought I would have to go back to that. I dreaded my first day, but to my surprise I absolutely thrived in the environment. I love people and have a very high tolerance for bitchy ones in particular. My first day flew by and as I counted out my $60 in tips I had made in 7 hours the joy of really enjoying my job was clashing with the realization that my income had just been cut to a fourth of what it had been.

The next day was better ($85 in tips) and the third day I almost managed to pull $100 ($96). My daily tips bounce from $60 to $90 on average depending on the day and the financial mood of my customers. I know I cannot make it on this but I am happy for now to be part of the Blue-Collar working class again. I get to work at 5am and am out the door by 12:30-1pm. I work 4 days a week which leaves plenty of time to explore other job options and still have time for my family.

So for now Jo has found happiness in greasy burgers, dirty plates and hands that smell of bleach water that desperately needs to be changed.

Ta ta for now...

~Darlin~

When You Hate Your Job...

2008-07-30T19:46:00.000-07:00

I feel almost ungrateful writing this but I have to say I HATE MY JOB! I have had such a great opportunity given to me, I mean I fell into owning my own company but I just am not passionate about what I do. Part of it is that my company, like many others these days, is going through financial problems. The stress this is putting on me since I am the one responsible for the financial end of things is literally wearing me to the point of exhaustion. I hate going into the office, I cringe every time my phone rings and I am worn out from working 15 hour days, 7 days a week.

But with my new attitude (thanks to The Success Principles) I will not dwell on this. I will look at all of this as a learning opportunity and keep pushing forward towards my new dreams and goals. It is proving rather hard to get past all of the negative people in my life though. I never realized how negative people are (probably because I was one of them) until I made a promise to myself to change my own attitiude. I am laughed at, mocked, glared at and constantly getting the eye roll from almost everyone in my life. All of this simply because I refuse to let things get me upset or angry. Now I am not saying that I NEVER get pissed off or upset anymore but when I do I make a point (often vocally) to reject the negative and find the positive in it.

I make it a point everyday to say something positive to everyone I come in contact with. You would be amazed at the amount of smiles you can collect in a day from telling someone something nice about themself. But the people who know me, and know what a bitch I have been in the past often laugh, make fun of me or just plain tell me to knock it off or shut up.

But I will not give up! I will not give in! I will just smile at those mocking me or trying to quiet me and tell them how nice they look today!!

~Darlin~

Volunteering and life goals.....

2008-07-21T06:16:00.000-07:00

Told ya'll I would be on here more often.

I finally heard back from my local animal shelter and will be signing up for their volunteer program. I have to take a volunteer training class on August 16th and then I am off and running on my first step towards me new goal of becoming a dog trainer.

"Starting out to make money is the greatest mistake in life.
Do what you feel you have a flair for doing, and if you are good enough at it, the money will come."
Greer Garson-Winner of the 1943 Academy Award for best actress

I have reached a place in life where I have realized that anything is possible. I have so many goals now I have had to narrow them down to the top ones and focus on those.

1. Become a licensed dog trainer
2. Open a pit bull rescue shelter
3. Buy a home in Northern Arizona (its cooler for the dogs)
4. Open a Bed and Breakfast (all my friends can come visit)
5. Quit smoking (doing this within the next few weeks)
6. Lose 20lbs. and get back in shape

Five and six will actually happen first but I will have all of these accomplished by Sept. 15, 2013. That gives me 6 years (my 40th birthday) to get it all done and then some.

More to come.

~Darlin~

Shameless copied from Toadee.....who copied it from KB!

2008-07-19T10:12:00.000-07:00

The Big Read reckons that the average adult has only read 6 of the top 100 books they've printed. Well let's see.
1) Look at the list and bold those you have read.
2) Italicise those you intend to read.
3) Underline the books you LOVE
4) Reprint this list in your own journal/blog so we can try and track down these people who've read 6 and force books upon them ;-)

1 Pride and Prejudice-Jane Austen.....LOVED
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien.....LOVED
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling....LOVED LOVED LOVED
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee....LOVED
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott....LOVED LOVED
12 Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy (when I was 16 to get an A in Literature)
25 The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34 Emma - Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens.....LOVED LOVED
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones' Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight's Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte's Web - EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

This makes 42 for me since the Harry Potter series contains 7 books!!!!

~Darlin~

Finding My Passion

2008-07-17T07:02:00.000-07:00

Most people who visit my blog know how passionate I am about my Pit Bull, Butter. She is my baby girl. I recently started reading the book "The Success Principles". It is a wonderful book that has made me re-evaluate my life and what I am doing with it. Although I like my job and love owning my own company, landscaping is not a passion for me. One of the first exercises in "The Success Principles" is to look inside yourself for what you are truly passionate about and for me I realized that that was my dog (outside of my children of course).

My baby girl is constantly looked down on and feared simply because of her breed. Ignorance has created hatred and hatred has created fear. So on August 6th I will begin my education to become a licensed dog trainer! I am so excited! My ulitimate goal is to open a Pit Bull rescue shelter but I will also take on classes and private lessons for clients also (outside of everyone in my family asking me to train their dogs for free).

I am giving you my word that I will now begin writing here at least 4 times a week. Most of them will involve my exercises from "The Success Principles" so you will probably be getting some pretty deep insight into ME.

On a side note...I took my 13 year old daughter to the doctor yesterday and as we were sitting in the waiting room she was reading over my shoulder. She made the comment that she wished they made a book like this ("The Success Principles") for teenagers. Well guess what...they do!! So she begged and pleaded and I of course went up and bought it. We have now made a promise to each other to discuss what we read that day at the end of the night before bed.

I will post again soon....

~Darlin~

A Good Burn

2008-05-21T19:12:00.000-07:00

A new story I am working on.....tell me what ya think....

Cali cringed as she watched the milk Jason had brought into the bedroom almost spill as he set it on the bedside table. How many times had she asked him not to eat or drink in bed? Her new bed set had cost over $300 and the thought of taking it in to have a milk spill removed made her angry beyond belief. He plopped down on the bed with his peanut butter sandwich and smiled at her with a smear of jam on the corner of his mouth. It wasn’t cute like it had been two years ago. Now it just made her want to wipe his mouth off and tell him to grow up. The smacking sounds that came from his mouth as he tried to pry the peanut butter off the roof of his mouth with his tongue made her nauseous. She rolled her eyes as he scanned through the channels to Sports Center. A deep sigh and her back turned suddenly to him was her way of telling him to take it all to the living room and let her sleep. But as usual he didn’t take the hint and in fact turned the TV up so he could hear the recount of the Suns losing their asses again even louder.

“They’re never going to win the playoffs. Hell they won’t even make it in this year,” she said, her back still to him. She could almost feel the anger her words provoked in him.

“Why can’t you just let me have this one thing? I love this team. Always have and I always will. That’s the point of being a real fan. You love them through the good and the bad.”

“I’m just saying”, she growled, her back still to him, “They never win. Why have faith in a team that takes you right to the edge and then lets you down every year?”

“Ya know ya could just tell me to go out in the living room Cali. You don’t have to pick a fight every time.”

She rolled over and glared at him. “I am not picking a fight Jason but Jesus Christ I do have to work at 4:30 in the morning! It would be nice to be able to go to bed without this stupid shit blaring in my ears”, she spat pointing at the commentators on TV.

“Whatever Cali. I don’t think you even like me anymore.” He grabbed his milk and his sandwich and started towards the living room. “By the way,” he turned looking at her, “The dog threw up on the bed today. I cleaned up what I could but if you notice a funny smell I didn’t have time to take your shit to the dry cleaners.” With that he walked into the living room, slamming the bedroom door for effect and leaving her in the dark wondering if that was what she had been smelling.

Cali woke up the next morning with a feeling of freedom. She lay in bed for awhile, wondering why she felt the way she did. Just as she was about to get up and head for the shower the bedroom door opened and Jason walked in headed straight for the bathroom.

“Can I ask you a question,” she asked tentatively.

Jason eyes went straight to the floor. “You can ask me anything. You know that.”

“Do you get the feeling we are about to break up,” she asked nonchalantly.

Cali could almost see the weight come off Jason’s shoulders as he looked directly at her. “Yes,” he said loud and clear.

They both called into work that morning and spent the day on the bed they had made love on countless times over the last two and a half years. They talked about their hopes and dreams for the future and playfully squabbled over who got what in the house. It was the most fun she had had with him in months and it almost made her rethink the decision to break up, but in the end she knew it was what should have happened years ago but neither of them had been brave enough to confront the other. They had come to rely on each other and both felt that the other relied on them. Their love for each other was real and true but it was not a love that lives were built on. More like a love that friendships were made of.

They decided that Cali would keep the house and Jason would find an apartment. By the end of the month, which was only two weeks away, he would have all his stuff out. Watching Jason box up his things and take them away one by one was not as joyful as that day on the bed. She cried every time he left the house with a car full of boxes. Images of him coming home, smelling like grease, and throwing himself on top of her as she squealed, begging him to take a shower would flood her mind. How he would come out of the shower in nothing but a towel and sit on the end of the bed, demanding that she present her feet for a foot rub, how he would tickle her back as she drifted off to sleep and how he would always ask if she needed anything before he climbed into bed himself. All of these things haunted her as she watched him drive his things away.

When the day came where he would not be returning for another load she sat on the bed, trying to hide her tears and telling herself not to make it harder for them by begging him not to go. He walked into the bedroom they had shared for years, looking around at anything but her.
“I think that’s it,” he said.

“Did you get all of your holey socks, “ she asked trying to hide the hurt and fear that were quickly surfacing.

Jason looked at her curled up on the side of the bed and fought the urge to wrap her in his arms and tell her that everything would be alright. She had to learn to trust her own abilities to make it on her own. “I left one pair for you,” he joked. “Thought you might need them when you forget to wash yours.”

Cali tried to laugh. She knew that he needed to see her smile or he would never be able to walk out, but the smile just wouldn’t come. Her heart was breaking. She was terrified that she was losing the best man she would ever have and all because she wasn’t enough for him to love. After two and half years he still wouldn’t even talk about marriage. At first she had thought it funny. Typical male. Fear of commitment. But after two years she had started to resent the fact that she had absolutely no doubt that she would spend the rest of her life with him and that he could not even bring himself to talk about it. Her self confidence was being eaten away by the fact that the man she loved more than anything did not seem to share those same devout feelings. That he would get angry at the mere mention of marriage.

Cali felt the bed sink below Jason’s weight as he sat down beside her. She still could not bring herself to look at him. “Why couldn’t I be enough,” she whimpered as the tears began to fall violently.

Jason wrapped her in his arms, holding her close to his chest. “You were always enough Cal. I am the one who doesn’t deserve you.”

She let out a tiny laugh into his chest. “You are so full of shit and you know it.”

He pulled her face up by her chin to look him in the eye. “You know I love you Cal and I know you love me. I can’t imagine not coming home to you, but if I am honest with you and me I have to say that I can’t imagine coming home to you every night for the rest of my life.” Cali pulled her face away from him, her face twisting with hurt. “Cali,” he said gently grabbing her chin again and raising her face to his, “Can you really say that if another year from now I still am not ready for marriage that you won’t hate me?”

Cali pulled her face away from his hand again, moving her body slightly away from his. “I could never hate you. I just don’t understand why I’m not enough.” She couldn’t believe the hurt and anger that was welling up inside her at the realization that he was really leaving. She wanted to punch him and slap him and tell him she hated him for not loving her enough, but the simple truth was she wanted him to be happy and all the anger in the world could not overcome that.

My Landscaping Company

2008-05-19T14:34:00.000-07:00

Hello again friends....I thought I would take the time to introduce all of you to some of the awesone people who work for me. From left to right....Kyle (my work husband), me, my partner John, Lupe, Herrold (my ex-husband), Jillian (my best friend), Marc, Sugar and Todd. I have been so fortunate over the last 6 months with the people that have came into my life. Some of them may look like ex-convicts but they are the hardest workers I know and I am proud to say I work with them.

On a seperate note....I am single now. Kevin and I have called it quits after 2 1/2 years. It was a good break up. We have ridden the "opposites attract" thing as far as we can and decided to get out before we hated each other.

So anybody know any hot, single men?

Love to you all.....

~Darlin~

Ok Here We Go

2008-05-04T16:04:00.001-07:00

Hello to all my friends, bloggers and non-bloggers alike. I have returned and I have so many things to share with all of you.

First I have three new tattoos. I took my sister in a few months ago to get her first (she is my older sister) and ended up walking out with three new ones myself.

The monkey on my neck may look familiar to some of you. The Evil Monkey in the Closet from Family Guy. I am someone who has several evil monkies in my closet and he is constant reminder that I have them and they need to stay there.

The second and third are on my forearms. Beautiful Disaster...I do not think these need any explanation. It is how I feel about myself.

In case some of you have not heard I am now a partner in a landscaping company. I fell into in by chance and it has been an amazing experience. Our company has tripled its workforce in the last few months and things just keep getting better. The only negative in that is I don't have very much time for anything but work.

I will post more soon.....

~Darlin~

I Wonder If Anyone Will See.....

2008-03-16T22:49:00.000-07:00

I can't even remember the last time I wrote here. I honestly can't remember the last time I wrote anything that wasn't some type of business form. I was so good for so long. I managed to keep that promise I made to myself about writing for almost a year....then the chaos that has always been a part of my life, that chaos that I thought had been caged, bit me in the ass for thinking such and consumed my life once again.

I will be working on writing again....posting more here, returning to my local writers group and of course continuing to work on my blockbuster novel that should be out sometime next never.

Love to you all-

~Darlin~

We Now Return To Our Regularly Scheduled Program

2007-12-11T13:32:00.000-08:00

Hello my friends.....have you missed me? A few posts ago I informed everyone that I had to go out and find another means of supporting my family. Well I got very lucky and signed on to help a friend and his partners out with their landscaping company (which was headed belly up due to poor accounting) and now just a short month later I have been given a percentage of partnership due to my dedication and of course my above average ability to control assholes!

So hopefully this means I will be well on my way to returning to a much more regular schedule of blogging again.

Thanks for all the support.

~Darlin~

Trick or Treat

2007-11-01T22:04:00.000-07:00

Here are the Halloween pictures that I promised. The one of me (yes in a skirt) is with my best friend's boyfriend. The other's are of my critters of course. A flesh eating zombie, a bound for the jailhouse Miss Behavin and of course, Black Spiderman (yes I yelled at him for climbing on my car but not until after I got this picture)

I hope everyone enjoys the pics...we enjoyed the day!

~Darlin~

Excuse the Interruption

2007-10-22T08:01:00.000-07:00

Some of you may have noticed that I have not written in a while. My apologies for that. I recently found out that as of the end of the year (yes right after the holidays) I will no longer have a job. I work in the construction industry and unfortunately new home sales are at their lowest point in 14 years so I will have to be let go. My boss is a wonderful lady, who at least showed me the courtesy of giving me two and a half months notice.

Because of this I have been working on a new income idea via the World Wide Web. Learning how to create websites and such is taking up the majority of my time now so I have been neglecting my blog. Again my apologies.

I will try and post more often but I ask for your understanding with my dilemma right now with needing to find a new source of income before my current one expires.

~Darlin~

A New Face on an Old Place

2007-10-04T08:10:00.000-07:00

Previously in my blog I have talked about my local watering hole. Due to the new "anti-smoking" legislation many smaller bars have suffered and some have even had to close their doors.

But my watering hole fought to beat the system and have come out victorious. The pictures here are of the new and improved Wendy Jack's Hidaway. They have created what I can only say is a wonderful outdoor smoking area that is almost completely enclosed except for one wall that is solar screened in. These screens will hold in the A/C and heat but allows the smoke out.

A pool table, jukebox, 3 plasma TV's and karoake at night makes this a sure bet for a new hot spot on the westside of town. So pull up a bar stool, order a drink and light a smoke. Everything is as it should be again.

~Darlin~

Keith's Gifts

2007-09-19T21:29:00.000-07:00

I think the final Helium gift has arrived and Sophie could not be more tickled about it. This one came in a big brown envelope with "Air Mail" stamped on it. She had tears in her eyes as she realized, once again, that Mama's friends on Helium were thinking of her.

She loves the book Keith. She refuses to use the pen because she doesn't want to use it up and the post cards are proudly displayed on her bedroom wall where she shows everyone that comes over.

Again I am humbled to my friends at Helium. You have all surprised me with your support and encouragement to a friend and her young daughter that you have never met. I have to be honest...Sophie did not receive a lot from our immediate family, but our family at Helium made her feel so cared for and she wanted to make you all proud with her quick recovery. She is doing very well now, she actually wants to go back to school. She should finally be able to take her brace off for the first time on the 28th of September. I will make sure and post pictures of that.

Thank you again all my friends who sent gifts and well wishes. You are greatly appreciated.

The Sunshine After the Rain

2007-09-12T11:42:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to share with everyone a bit of why I love Arizona. I know it can be terrible hot during the summer (110 degrees +) but it is also a dry heat and very beautiful. This is a picture I took right after a really hard downpour. The colors here are like none I have seen anywhere else and I have lived/been to a lot of places. Enjoy.

~Darlin~

The Gifts Keep On Comin"

2007-09-05T17:44:00.001-07:00

"It's here....IT'S HERE!" The words rang through the house like a bomb going off. We didn't even see it tucked behind the pillar next to our front door at first but as I returned to the car for the second load of groceries today there is was. The Helium gift.

My younger two clamored to be the one to deliver it to Sophie. They had been told it was coming and not to tell her. They amazingly did not. But soon Sophie was roused from her room by all the ruckus. "Whats here'" she asked spying the package I had wrestled away from my son.

I held it out to her and asked her if she remembered all the friends I talked about on Helium, the ones who's stories we read and who's blogs we visited. Her eyes lit up as she shook her head vigorously up and down. "This is from them," I said setting it on the counter for her to examine. I grabbed a knife and carefully (yes carefully CD) cut through the tape and held back the flaps as she pushed through the styrofoam peanuts to retrieve her present. She tried her hardest to pull the box out and finally looked at me with a lack of patience.

I pulled it out to a squeal of delight.
I think dogs started to go crazy for at
least a mile around. "Oh mama...LOOK! Its perfect. It's my
first music thing for my music room!"

Really and truly my friends you could not have done a better job on selecting a gift. It is truly something that will stay with her always....perhaps now she will even take up the drums.

Wait a minute....YOU GUYS DID THIS ON PURPOSE DIDN'T YOU?!?!?

Thanks to all who put in for this. I don't know what else I can say except you all made us feel very special and loved.

~Darlin & Sophie~

What Are You Passionate About?

2007-09-04T18:42:00.000-07:00

I recently asked this question to a friend of mine. His response....

"I don't think anyone has ever asked me that before."

He was unable to give me an answer. This distressed me even more because this person is amazing and even I could think of some answers for him, but I did not provide them because I want him to hopefully really ponder this question. Maybe in doing so he will discover a little more about himself than he knew.

So I pose this question to all who visit my blog....

What are you passionate about?

I think that the answer to this question can tell you so much about a person and I want to know as much as I can about the people who are thoughtful enough to take time out of their day and visit me here.

My answer:
My children....making sure they receive the upbringing they deserve and that they are able to choose who they become.

Pit Bulls....Most who know me know who Butter is and the "issues" I have had to face since having her. I am determined to try and convince as many people as possible that it is the deed you blame, not this wonderful, loving breed.

Illegal immigration....I live in a state where I have to deal daily with illegals. I have personally felt the results of having someone steal you identity (actually it was my 11 year old daughter's) and I believe strongly that they have no right to be here if they did not go through the right channels. I don't care how difficult those channels may be.

Those would be my top three. I can't wait to hear all of yours.

~Darlin~

Thanks to Jadey Girl and her family.....

2007-09-01T14:53:00.000-07:00

The first of the Helium gifts has arrived at our house and as you can see by the smile on her face, Sophie is absolutely overjoyed. Jadey Girl and her family made cards for Sophie, her favorites are the ones from the baby Jadey girl. They also included some cosmetics and of course a teen magazine which she has not put down since it arrived. Her walls are plastered with everything she could tear out of it.

Thanks again to everyone for their well wishes, thoughts and prayers. Jadey Girl I really can't thank you enough. This made her week, in a week where getting a smile outta her was proving damn near impossible.

~Darlin~

It's Coming!!!!!!!!!

2007-08-28T12:06:00.000-07:00

Yes it is that time of year again! Time for my favorite holiday EVER!!!

HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Every year I morph into a child once again (a child with a bank account) and go mad in the stores buying the creepiest, scariest, grossest decorations I can find and I then spend days, if not a week, setting up the perfect display.

I will definataly be posting pictures of our decorations once we get them up......

Is the beginnig of September too early to start?

BOO to you all!!!!!!!!

~Darlin~

An Update and Pictures of Daughter's Surgery

2007-08-27T07:28:00.000-07:00

Ok so here are the pictures that I promised. The first two are of the brace that she will have to wear for the next six weeks....The next two were taken minutes before she and Carter (the bear she has had since birth) went back to surgery and the last one is of the scar on the back of her shoulder. She also has two small scars on the front but I couldn't get a clear picture.

A little background here....when my daughter was born she was 9 1/2 lbs., much bigger than was expected, and it ended up being a very difficult birth. She essentially got "stuck" and in order for her to be delivered they had to use every available tool to get her out. This resulted in her right shoulder being dislocated and all of the nerves and mucsles on the right side of her neck, torso and arm to be stretched and torn. She was completely unable to move her head to the right and had no movementin her right arm until she was about 6 months old and then it was very minimal. It remained that way for the last 12 years and it took that long for me to convince the doctor's that my daughter's condition was not going to "fix itself" as they kept telling me it would.

So for 12 years her shoulder has been dislocted. When they finally did ex-rays and found this they said she needed the surgery she had on the 22nd to repair it. The had to carve out her shoulder socket because bone had grown into it to the arm bone could not go into the socket. They also had to lengthen muscles and nerves in the back of her shouler and shorten ones in the front. They now say that she should have 80-90% mobility.

She is doing much better now....down to only a few pain pills a day. A new problem has developed though....we now have to deal with bed sores that are developing under her brace....I am going to call the doctor today and see if we can take the brace off long enough to put a shirt on underneath the brace to help prevent them.

A big thanks to everyone for their support and thoughts.

~Darlin~

Update on My Daughter

2007-08-25T15:06:00.000-07:00

I know that everyone was waiting for pictures of my daughter but you will have to wait just a few days longer. For some reason the computer that the pics are on will not let me connect to the internet even though it says I have a connection.....grrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

I know it is probably something simple but I will have more time to spend on it Monday morning....until then ya'll will just have to wait.

CD....I am still planning on posting part three of Bubble Baths and Handguns.....just been a little busy lately. Perhaps Monday also....

Love to all

~Darlin~

I Need A Drink

2007-08-15T11:08:00.001-07:00

I haven't updated my blogs for almost a week so I figured I had better write something before CD comes after me. Life has been pretty chaotic lately, with the kids starting back at school and moving into the new house I have had little time for anything other than homework and unpacking.

The good news is that the kids are falling back into their homework routine quickly and I only have 3-5 boxes left to unpack and a ton of family pictures to hang, but then I am done. I will hopefully get back into the swing of writing daily again.

I did delete my pit bull blog because I don't have time to keep up with the other two and that one required a lot of research and factual writing.

Right now I am thinking about how badly I would love to go have a drink after work and sit in the corner observing the other patrons and making notes on their little quirks. They way they hold their drink, or what they do with their hands when they are not holding a drink. The body language between them, they way they speak or how they just sit there staring at nothing.

I have had the pleasure of finally speaking to a friend I made online and hearing this person's voice was such a joy. You always wonder if people will sound like you think they do and fortunately this person and I agreed that each sounded just as the other thought they would. There are many people I have met online who I would love to just call up and chat with. I have grown to depend on their support and encouragement.

So I think I have rambled enough for now. I will try and get down to some serious writing in the very near future. Perhaps working more on some stories.

Till then ya'll

~Darlin~

Mute Monday....unzipped

2007-08-06T11:39:00.001-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2007-08-01T09:58:00.000-07:00

WINDING DOWN @ WENDY JACK'S ON WEDNESDAYS

My Interview with Jadey Girl

2007-07-31T09:03:00.000-07:00

Interview rules: Leave me a comment saying “Interview me next" or "Hit me with your best shot" or something along those lines letting me know you're down to be questioned. :DI’ll respond by commenting back on your blog with your five questions. I get to pick the questions.You will then update your blog with a post containing your the answers to the questions.You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.So, who wants to give it a go? Leave a comment and let me know if you're down to let me do you next. At least one of you has to let me do an interview with ya. It'll be easy, fun, virtually painless and you'll enjoy it. :DAnyone else up for an interview? See my blog and leave a comment!

1. If you could be a famous landmark not person in history what would you be and why?
A. Famous landmark...Vietnam Veterans Memorial. It is something that has always inspired so many emotions in me. Fear..of it happening again, Anger...at the way our veterans were treated then, Sorrow...for all of those that were lost and Admiration...for every name on there and what they sacrificed for this country.

2. What has been the most influential thing that you have done in your life that you consider a major accomplishment for you?
A. My children....I often think that if I hadn't had them I never would have turned my life away from the dark path I was headed down with drugs and crime. They made me want to be a better person and because of them I am.

3. Most embarassing time in your life that you can remember and please include the details?
A. The day I had to tell my children I was going to jail for a DUI. A lot of people critizied me for even telling them that I got a DUI, muchless telling them that I was going to jail that morning because of it. But I do not hide my flaws from my children. They need to know that no one is unfallable, even their parents, and I want them to learn from my mistakes. But having to look them in the eyes, hug them and tell them that I was going to jail was heartbreaking. It was embarrassing to have them have to see that and know that mom had made such a stupid mistake.

4. If you could hold a high ranking job title such as President, or vice president, or any other high titled job what would you choose and why do you think you would be a good candidate? A.I don't think I would want any of those jobs. My ideal "power" jobwould be being in charge of a charity that helps single moms and dads get back on their feet.

5. Who is the one person you would love to meet and how would you spend your day with that person details?

Hmmm.....this is a tough one. I would love to meet David Mech the wolf researcher. I would spend the day with him in the wild, observing the world's most beautiful and loing creatures.

~Darlin~

Mute Monday....

2007-07-30T12:04:00.000-07:00

Butter....Butter....Butter...PARKAY!!!

More Than You Care To Know

2007-07-25T07:58:00.000-07:00

Okay, here's the deal: you've been hand picked by someone who likes you to fill out this survey. It's a great boredom buster and at the end you get to pick your own 5 people to fill it out. If you don't fill it out, the person that sent this to you will hunt you down and kill you -- not really, but it's fun so keep it going! Once you post your answers, pick 5 people of your own to do it. Have fun!

1. What is your middle name: Jo

2. Color pants are you wearing? Blue jeans

3. What are you listening to now? My boss talk to her husband

4. What was the last thing you had to drink? coffee

5. Do you wish on stars? Yes....

6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Burnt orange

7. How is the weather right now? clear skies, 100 degrees and muggy

8. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My boss before she got to work

9. Do you like the person who sent this to you? He's alright

10. Favorite drink? Jack Daniels

11. Favorite sport? Boxing

12. Hair color? Brown

13. Siblings? 4 sisters, 3 brothers (I am the baby girl)

14. Favorite month: October....that's when Halloween is!!!

15. Favorite food? Pizza

16. What was the last movie you saw? Theatre-Transformers Home-The Zodiac

17. Favorite day of the year: HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

18. What do you do to vent anger? drive fast or drink....NEVER the two combined!

19. What was your favorite toy as a child? My G.I. Joes

20. Summer or winter? SUMMER baby

21. Hugs or kisses? Kisses....soft ones, hard ones, short ones, long ones, sweet innocent ones, or naughty naughty NAUGHTY ones

22. Car or motorcycle? Motorcycle

23. Chocolate or vanilla? Vanilla

24. Do you want your friends to do this? Most of them already have

25. Who is most likely to do this self-survey? Not sure...most have already done it

26. Who is least likely to respond? Hera...I think she was abducted by the Helium police

27. When was the last time you cried? Friday when I signed the papers for my house

28. What is under your bed? My dog

29. Who is the friend you have had the longest? My step-mom....27 years and counting

30. What did you do last night? Went to the movies and rented a movie.....

31. What are you afraid of? Dying slowly....spiders

32. Plain or buttered or salted popcorn? Butter, butter up to the sky

33. Favorite car?

34. Favorite flower? sunflowers and daisies

35. How many keys on your key ring? 6

36. How many years at your current job? 9 months

37. What did you do on your last birthday? Cried and drank...my grandmother passed on my birthday so I don't really like to do anything

38. How many states have you lived in? 6- Washington, Oregon, California, Arizona, New Mexico and Georgia

39. Did you have fun with this? Sure

40. Who are you going to send this to? Man...everyone I know has done it....let's try Hera, Mark, Patt, toadee and Mutters

~Darlin~

Whiskey Fires....Part 1

2007-07-24T13:13:00.000-07:00

Ember stared at herself in the mirror. Her eyes didn’t seem that blue anymore, she could spot gray hairs amidst the brown without even leaning towards the mirror and the bags under her eyes aged her well beyond her 33 years. She sighed deeply and walked into the kitchen. She opened the cabinet above the stove and took down the fifth of Jack she kept stashed behind the bags of sugar. She grabbed a shot glass from her large collection that lined the top of her stove. This particular tall, skinny one was her favorite. She had found it while browsing the local Goodwill store. The wolf etched into the side of the glass looked very much like the one she had tattooed on her left shoulder. Too much of a coincidence and she had had to buy it.

The smell of stout whiskey drifted up to her nose as she opened the bottle and poured the first shot. She hesitated, staring at the tiny glass in her hand, almost afraid of the warming relief it would bring. But in the end the need to relax and go numb for a while won out and she downed the shot. Shaking her head she made that slight growl in the back of her throat as the whiskey seared its way down. She couldn’t remember when she had stopped drinking beer and the fruity drinks she and her girlfriends used to enjoy creating, but nowadays she was a straight whiskey girl. She didn’t even really like the taste but she loved the way it lit a trail down her throat to her warm her belly and liked that its effect’s were quick.

She poured another shot while standing at the kitchen counter, not hesitating this time to drink it down. Another shake and growl. She walked over to the fridge, noting that she needed a manicure as she grabbed the handle and pulled it open. She snagged a Pepsi and made a mental note to clean the fridge out at her earliest convenience. Some of the food was on the verge of talking it had been there so long.

She abandoned the shot glass at the sink, grabbed the bottle of whiskey off the counter and plopped down on the couch. She sat cross-legged with the bottle nestled in her lap and lit a cigarette, enjoying the fact that there was no one there to complain about her smoking in the house. As she leaned over to set the Pepsi on the coffee table her hair fell across the end of her cigarette that dangled from her lips sending the smell of smoldering hair into the air. She hardly noticed, swept her hair back over her shoulder and sat back. She took a long draw of the bottle, chasing it this time with a little Pepsi to soften the burn.

Ember thought long and hard about what she would do this evening. She was already feeling a pretty good buzz and she wondered if it was a good idea to drive. But as she took another pull off the bottle she noted that it was already emptied below the halfway point and would not last the night.

Let the tagging continue...

2007-07-16T06:42:00.000-07:00

1. I have to post these rules before I give you the facts.

2. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits aboutthemselves.

3. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eightthings and post these rules.

4. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.

5. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Eight random things about Jo:

1-I love to cook (and I'm good at it)
2- In high school I weighed 200 lbs.
3- I have a fear of deep, open water
4- I am a very crafty person
5- I can fix just about anything
6- I am a clean freak
7- I am horrible with finances
8- I am a soft person at heart

I am tagging CD,Jayne, KB, Mark, Toadee, Mutters, Patti and Hera.

~Darlin~

Explanations.....

2007-07-12T10:15:00.000-07:00

...Ok so a few people are actually feeling bad for ole Tomcat. And I think someone even made that comment that I have issues with men. Well please don't fell bad for Tomcat. I am not naive when it comes to the ways of man, nor am I foolish enough to believe that just because a guy says his intentions are true does not mean he is telling the truth. Men, like any other animal, haVE learned to adapt to their environment. If blowing smoke up some girl's ass about how he has searched endlessly for "the one" to no avail and how he is ready to give up on love, gets him laid, then more power to him. I put the fault on the woman for falling for it. I really do not believe that anyone, male or female can claim to be ignorant when it comes to the ways of the opposite sex and their mating rituals.

Dr. Ruth, Dr. Phil, Oprah, MTV, Bravo and the E Network have provided more than enough educational shows on these practices. We are living in a world filled with programs that show us the true side of dating. Women have known for years how men really are. That a man's main concern is sex and that just because he sleeps with you the first night you meet does not mean he wants a damn relationship. But for some reason women continue to delude themselves into thinking that because they are so gosh darn unique that he will see this and realize he can't get you out of his head. ITS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!! If you went home with him the first night you are most likely never going to hear from him again UNLESS he wants to get laid. And even then it will probably only be because he couldn't get it from a new piece.

Now don't get me wrong. I have a lot of respect for men and their prowess. As educated as women are these days these guys continue to get you into bed and then break your hearts. That is a pretty impressive thing to me that they can keep fooling women. And I am not saying that every man is like this. There are good guys out there, but if he is trying to get you in bed the first time he meets you, its a pretty safe bet that he is not one of the good guys.

My explanation is this. I love men. I love playing the flirting game with them. I love seeing the high they get off of thinking they have netted another one. And I love knowing that I know the truth and that I am not falling for it. Men are incredibly fun to be around if you can relax and stop trying to size up whether they are marriage material or not. I knew what Tomcat was up to.

However, if you are going to play their game ladies you better be able to play rough and hard. No soft hearts allowed. We get tired of picking up the pieces and drying the tears!

The Fun of a Good Flirt....Part 3

2007-07-12T08:37:00.000-07:00

…”Standard Eight then”, he asks as he begins the pointless search for a good house cue.

“Sure. You can use my cue if ya want. None of those are worth a damn.” I hand tomcat my cue and drop three quarters into the table’s coin slots. “I’ll rack you break?”

Tomcat is still standing behind me as I bend over to retrieve the balls from the drop box and begin to set them into the frame. I can feel his eyes coveting my body as I repeatedly bend over. I look behind me under my right arm. “Whatcha lookin at?”

“Just making sure you know what you’re doin. Nice rack by the way.”

I smile and pull the frame away. “Your break Tomcat.”

“Why do you keep calling me that? My name is…”

“Don’t really care what your name is.” I smile sweetly so as not to offend him by my disinterest.

“Can I ask yours at least?”

“You can ask but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna tell ya.”

“It Jo,” a voice rings out from my group of friends. Betrayed by my own. Damn it! I scowl openly at the group. They must have some serious money riding on Tomcat.

“Jo huh? Well nice to meet you I’m Scott”, he offers me his hand. I shake it looking into his eyes, smiling.

“Your break Tomcat,” I repeat and he grins. He walks around the table and bends over to break as I stand at the opposite end of the table, hands on the rail, leaning over just enough to where he can see slightly down my shirt and the devilish little smile playing on my lips.

“JO,” Sheri yells on her way over to the table. “What are you doing girl? You know league starts in 5 minutes. Come on I’ll give ya your money back.” I shrug at Tomcat and follow Sheri back to the bar where she hands me my seventy five cents and a shot of Jack.

Tomcat sets my cue down and starts to make his way over to me but is cut off by Youngblood who is returning from the bathroom. “So you gonna tell me your name yet,” he asks.

“Her name is Jo,” says a voice from behind him. Tomcat is not stepping back this time and sidesteps his friend to stand beside me.

“Hey Scott,” Youngblood sighs. “I saw you two settin up for a game. Is it over already?”

I glance up at Tomcat. “Not quite yet Youngblood.” A puzzled look crosses his face.

“What’d you call me?”

“Youngblood,” I state simply.

Tomcat waves a dismissive hand at his young friend. “Don’t ask.”

“So can I buy you another drink,” Youngblood asks as he moves just a bit closer. I am starting to feel a little claustrophobic trapped between these two. He places his hand on my arm as he attempts to turn me back towards the bar.

“No thanks. Switched to coffee a little while ago. Why don’t ya buy one for Tomcat here,” I ask as I signal back over my shoulder.

“He can buy his own,” he scowls. I shrug and head back over to my table. Tomcat and Youngblood seem to be having a rather heated discussion back at the bar and I smile sinfully at my girls. It will be time to go soon so I must make my final play shortly.

“Tomcat,” I yell across the room as I wave him over. I step away from the group as he walks up to me.

“You called,” he says with a playful smile.

“I have to get going soon so I just wanted to say thanks for hangin out.”

“So should we hang out again sometime,” he asks hopefully.

“Well obviously I am here a lot. So you know where to find me.”

“Can I get your number? Maybe we could go out sometime?”

“I don’t think so.” My coldness is coming through now and he starts to get curious.

“Come on. I think we would have a great time. I am really into you.”

I laugh. “Yeah cause you know so much about me right?”

“That’s the point of getting your number.” He walks over to the bar and asks Sheri for a pen as he grabs a napkin. He hands them to me. “You know you want to give it to me.”

And that my friends were the words that lost him the game. “Ok sure.” I take the napkin and write down my number. “Call me later tonight k?” I give him a brief hug and return one last time to my table to say my farewells.

LATER THAT NIGHT:

Tomcat dials: 623-555-1234

In deep announcer voice:

You have reached the rejection line. Obviously the person who gave you this number did not want you to have their real number. This does not in any way mean that you should try to contact this person again. THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED!! If you see them, walk away. Do not try and talk to them, do not bring up this message and for christ’s sake stop buying them drinks.

Thank you for calling….have a nice day.

~click~

The Fun of a Good Flirt....Part 2

2007-07-11T08:39:00.000-07:00

For a moment I am stunned but then I look at my girlfriends and we erupt in laughter and high-fives. The men in our group roll their eyes and throw back their heads. We all grab our drinks and yell a thank you to the newbie table as we raise our glasses in salute. I watch to see Tomcat's reaction to his alley mates generosity. He looks puzzled for a moment until his blonde comrade raises his drink in return. A wave of clarity rushes over him as he realizes that his friend is vying for my attention.

The game is truly on now as a man thrives on competition. I grin at my girlfriends, grab my drink and a smoke and head back over to see my old friend the jukebox.

“What would ya like to hear,” Tomcat asks as he slides up beside me.

“I am in to just about anything”, I tease. I slide my dollar bill into the slot and scan through the various artists. “What are you fond of?”

“Right now I would have to say that is you.” I look at him out of the corner of my eye a slight smile crossing my lips.

“Like I haven’t heard THAT before.” I make my selection, AC/DC Hells Bells and turn to resume my game of pool. Tomcat is not quite ready to let me escape again. He grabs my hand gently pulling me back.

“You come here often”, he asks sarcastically.

“I pull my hand from his slowly, “Nope. Never been here before in my life. I don’t even know those people”, I say pointing to my group of friends who are unabashedly watching us. “They just looked like a fun group to hang out with.”

He waves at the spectators and smiles down at me, “You could always sit with me.”

“Or your friend,” I tease.

He glances over at his younger pal. “Yeah well he likes to try and impress with his bank account since he doesn’t have any real charm to offer.”

“Ouch! Is someone a little bitter”, I ask.

“Uh that would be a no”, he says chuckling. “I have plenty. I just don’t need to flaunt it.”

Bouncing on the balls of my feet I make a quick dash back to my table. “Gotta get back to my game.”

As Tomcat makes his way back to the newbie table I note that his blonde friend is at the bar. He turns holding a shot of Jack up in my direction and throws his head back slightly to silently call me over. I take my shot, missed, grab a smoke and head to the bar. I sidle up next to Youngblood and take my drink. “Thanks. Cheers’, as I clink my glass against his beer.

“So what’s your name”, he asks taking a sip of beer and eyeing my tits.

I laugh to myself. “I don’t think that is really what you want to know is it.”

Raising his eyes from my tits he looks at me confused. “What’d ya mean?”

“Well I think your real question is “Are you gonna sleep with me tonight?”. That’s what you really want to know isn’t it?” He sputters a little of his beer down his chin wiping at it with is hand.

“Um…no. I mean don’t get me wrong. You’re hot but maybe I want to get to know you too.”

This time I can’t keep my laughter silent. “Right and I was born yesterday and I’m still a virgin at the age of 32. Thanks for the drink…again.” I walk back over to my table, smiling at Tomcat as I pass. My friends are rolling with laughter. They get a kick out of watching me work. This is a favorite pastime of mine and they have come to view it as a spectator sport.

I have a pretty good buzz at this point. Time to switch up what I am drinking. “Sheri! Can I get a coffee sweets?” Sheri nods and delivers a fresh cup of coffee to me. Tomcat’s courage seems to have been found in the bottom of his last bottle. He walks over, smack dab in the middle of my group of friends and grabs my cue.

“How about a game”, he asks staring directly into my eyes.

I am a little intrigued by his bravery. No one has ever ventured into my territory when it is inhabited by so many of my friends. I look around and notice the looks on my friend’s faces. A few are shocked but most are trying not to laugh. They know I have been caught off guard. I quickly regain my composure and pull my cue back towards me. “What’d ya have in mind,” I purr.

“Well we could play doubles with some of your friends or we could go head to head…mano e mano. If you think you could handle it.”

I glance over at my friends who shrug and wave me off to battle on my own. “Guess its just you and me Tomcat. Let the games begin.”

The Fun of a Good Flirt....Part 1

2007-07-10T07:38:00.000-07:00

...I sit at the local waterin hole, perched on a bar stool, lazily stirring my whiskey sour. Barely lifting my head from admiring the way the dark brown whiskey blends perfectly with the mellow yellow of the sour mixer, my eyes scan the room. The ususals are here...the dead heads as we call the old cronies who inhabit this spot. Always complaining that the music is too loud or the drinks are too strong, they set a tone that if not raged against would kill any fun at all. My hopeful eyes make a full 360 of the room with nothing to appreciate for it. I return to my drink hoping for some excitement before the time to return home arrives.

As I near the bottom of my glass and contemplate whether or not to order another the distinct sound of the upstairs door opening visits my ears. I hear voices I don't recognize and I anxiously turn to see who will bound down the stairs. To my delight it is a group of men and women who look as if they are in desperate need of post work refreshment. The bartender barks a demand for ID's as I discreetly observe the group. They're not in couples. There are two girls and four guys. Hands around the waist and soft kisses tell me who is with whom and who is left to play with.

I appears I have two options. The first looks to be in his mid twenties. His soft blue eyes are already staring intently at the tattoo on my lower back that peaks out when I lean over to take a pull off of my drink. I turn my head slightly. He bashfully smiles and runs his fingers through his short blonde hair. I turn back to my drink. I'm not big on blondes.

The newbies seat themselves in the corner closest to the bar, much to the dismay of the dead heads, and begin to boisterously recount their workday. I did not get a good look at my second choice yet so I wave the bartender over and request $5 in ones for the jukebox. As I walk over I glance over at the table. The second option is much more to my taste. Late thirties, dark hair, nice build. I can’t see his face fully yet so I walk over to the jukebox returning a smile from one of the young ladies with the group. This is odd behavior to me. Usually the girls are givin me the stink eye. I cozy up to the jukebox, an old friend of mine, and begin my selections. Some Hinder, Aerosmith, Carrie Underwood and Rob Zombie should do the trick.

As I turn to head back to my seat I bump squarely into option number two, who has decided that he wants to make some selections. I raise my eyes from his chest to his face, admiring his deep brown eyes and smile slightly, placing a hand softly against his chest as I move past.

“Excuse me”, I mutter as I move away and return to my seat. He is very handsome and none of the “Aw shucks” bullshit that the younger one has. I glance back once in route to my barstool and he smiles directly into my eyes. He is confident. That is a major turn on. I smile back, sit down and order another drink.

The bar begins to fill up slowly. My usual group of friends arrives and we begin our slow descent into licentiousness. The drinks flow freely and are consumed just as quickly. We have moved from the bar to a table conveniently located directly across from option number two’s line of sight.

The coyness of sobriety is wearing off as the drinks are settling in and my actions are filled with a little more bravado. I bravely examine the occupants of the newbie’s table hoping to catch the eye of option number two. My friends have noticed the object of my attention and the men in our group start with their jibes about the fate of this poor guy. Our uproarious laughter draws the attention of the newbie table and I am allowed a brief moment of enticing eye contact with option number two. In that brief tick where our eyes meet my coquettish facade is replaced by a more brazen, are you man enough demeanor.

He reacts exactly as I predict he will. A challenge has been set before him and like any man he cannot resist a battle he is sure he will win. Little does he know that the female he is now viewing as prey has taken down men wiser, stronger and more confident than he. Like a sassy little kitty cat I walk by him on the way to the pool table, swishing my back end to get the Tomcat’s attention.

Keeping my awareness strictly on the game at hand I avoid any further glances in his direction for the time being. He however cannot take his eyes off of my form that is now fully bent over the pool table in an attempt to make a very long shot. Nine ball, corner pocket! I walk over to my table to light a smoke and slam down some Jack before I plan my next move both in the pool game and in the game between Tomcat and I.

I step up to the bar to order another drink. I feel his presence before I see him, standing behind me, calculating his next move. The bartender’s eyes confirm my gut feeling as she glances over my head and then into my eyes with that “You got him” smile.

“Ya gonna buy me a drink or what”, I say without turning. The bartender, Sheri, receives her nod of approval from him but I spin abruptly, leaning against the bar on my elbows. “No I think I changed my mind. This one is on me Sheri,” I tell her. “Whatch ya drinkin Tomcat?”

He smiles and shakes his head in resignation. “I’ll have a Bud, but I’d like to buy these.”

“I can appreciate that fact Tomcat but I don’t like feelin like I owe anybody, especially someone I don’t know. So this ones on me”, I nod to Sheri “and you can perhaps get the next one”. I hand him his Bud, grab my drink, smile and walk back to the pool tables.

Out of the corner of my eye I see him walk back to the newbie table where his friends instantly lean in to get the news of his adventure into my territory. Pleasantly I notice that he is not full of the usual swagger and boasting that most guys would be. He shrugs, shows the beer and they all look in my direction. I smile as he holds up his beer in toast to me and I silently raise my own drink.

Several more strategically planned shots into my game Sheri the bartender comes over with drinks for me and my friends. I smile knowingly and Sheri corrects my incorrect assumption. “They’re from the blonde guy.”

To be continued....

No More Nice Girl!!

2007-07-06T11:48:00.000-07:00

I have spent a lot of time on the blogs lately and I realized something...I have not been very true to myself here. I have written about things that I feel others will find interesting and I have always tried to keep it civil. Now anyone who really knows me knows that I am loud, obscene, opinionated and often so truthful it can be mistaken for rudeness. But for some reason here I have tried to be a good girl and where the hell is the fun in that?

So from here on out I pledge to be a more realistic version of myself. No more watching my words and hoping I don't offend too many people. I will be what everyone who matters to me loves....ME!

Can you go home again?

2007-07-05T10:29:00.000-07:00

For Father's Day this year I flew back home to Oregon to surprise my father. I have not missed Oregon in the 15 years since I moved to Arizona. I love AZ. But being home and being with my family, those people who 15 years ago I did not get along with so well, really made me consider packin it up and movin back home.

There was a feeling of safety that I have not felt in years. Like I could let my children outside and they wouldn't disappear. All the neighbors that were there when I grew up are still there! 15 years I had been gone and I still knew almost everyone.

I miss being able to walk into my backyard and plant something without it having to be a cactus that will hurt like hell when the kids run into it. The cherry tree in my dad's backyard that I used to climb as a kid was still there and as I climbed it at the age of 32, sat in the branches enjoying cherries so fresh they melted in my mouth and spat the pits at whomever dared walk under my domain, I realized that this was something that my own children would never experience. All of the memories I have of growing up are things that my own children may very well never know.

I can't explain it but things just felt simpler there. More relaxed and definately cleaner. Taking in a deep breath of that wonderfully clean air was so refreshing. Looking out across the horizon and seeing beautiful skies and clear mountains, nothing obscured by hazy brown clouds. I wonder if these feelings were supported by the fact that Oregon represents the innocence of my childhood. Did it feel safer and cleaner because that is how I saw it as a child or is it really that way compared to the dirty, dangerous place I live now?

How do you move back home after 15 years? Where do you live? How do you support your family? How do you leave your family here in exchange for the family there? And what if after you give up everything here you get there and realize it was all an illusion?

~Darlin~

DUI's & Traffic School

2007-07-05T08:58:00.000-07:00

February 2006 I received a DUI (Driving Under the Influence). I was shocked and horrified. What would my friends and family say? I have to be honest and say that up until this point I had no idea what the real repercussions would be from this. I mean I knew it would be on my driving record for 5 years (now 7), that my insurance would increase and that I would have to pay a lot of money in fines. What I did not know was how it effects EVERY aspect of your life. My total punishment:

DUI on my record for 7 years
24 hours in jail ($386)
90 day license suspension ($45 reinstatement fee)
Alcohol evaluation class ($75)
Alcohol awareness class ($125)
Defensive Driving class ($65)
Traffic Survival class ($55)
Approximately $1900.00 in fines
License on probation for 2 years

I was pulled over last Friday night for making an improper right hand turn and speeding and to my dismay the officer informed me that my license was suspended. I did argue because I had paid to have my license reinstated after my 90 suspension because of my DUI. Unfortunately I found out (after pulling out every piece of paperwork I have ever received for tickets) that I had not attended one of the required classes. I had mistakenly thought that defensive driving and traffic survival were the same thing. Believing this I only attended the first. So yes, my license was indeed suspended. The officer assumed that it was suspended for my DUI and under Sheriff Joe's new laws they had to impound my car for a minimum of 30 days.

I called around Saturday morning and luckily found a lady who was willing to allow me into her Sunday class (you are supposed to sign up a week in advance). I took the class Sunday from 7:30am to 5pm. It was taught by a very charismatic young lady named Kristen (pictured above). She was entertaining and kept the class involved and awake. I did learn quite a bit in the class about the new DUI laws that passed only last month.

If in the next 2 years I get pulled over for ANYTHING I go back to jail for 9 days, my fines triple and my license is then suspended for 180 days. If I get pulled over for a DUI in the next 7 years then I go to jail for 90 days, license is suspended for a year, fines from $5,000-$10,000 and pretty much my life is ruined. Not worth it!!

So I took the class Sunday, went and got my license back Monday morning but unfortunately I cannot get my car back until I have an impound hearing which they have 5 days to schedule. What upset me was that they impounded it falsely yet I still cannot get it back. So now I am driving around in a like 1982 Corsica that my boss loaned me until I get my car back. It sucks but hey it gets me to work and back so I can't complain. Its better than riding the bus or walking.

The really ironic thing about this....when I got pulled over last Friday....I was the designated driver! Figures!

~Darlin~

Daddy's Girl

2007-06-29T11:03:00.000-07:00

For those of you who know me it may come as a big shock that I am a Daddy's girl through and through. In the picture here that is (from left to right) my sister Teresa, my Daddy and me when I went back home for Father's Day. My father was very strict on us growing up. My mother and he divorced when I was 6 and I had two extremes when it came to parents. Mom was very relaxed, let me pretty much do what I wanted. Dad on the other hand ruled us with an iron fist. He only had to spank me twice in my life. Both when I was very young. But to hear my father raise his voice at me, to this day can bring me to tears.

My fondest memories of my father:

Going to the city dump and then Dairy Queen for an ice cream every Saturday

Dancin in the garage to the oldies when he would work on his cars

Camping (duh)

Flying in his plane

Going to the lumber mill he worked at everyday with mom for lunch and riding the forklift

Flannel shirts and Levi jeans (enough said)

Coffee and toast in the morning before he went to work

Bedtime games (Tickatoos, Round Moon, Johnny Fireman)

I can still remember climbing out of bed at 3am in the morning to walk into the kitchen and see my big, strong Daddy standing there in his flannel shirt with a white t-shirt underneath and his Levi jeans. My little bare feet were always cold as I crawled into his lap to eat our toast and drink coffee. I would pull his over sized t-shirt that I always wore to bed over my knees and he would wrap his arms around me to warm me. Before he left for work he would carry me back to my room and tuck me back into bed.

I am blessed to have a father as wonderful as mine. He was the ideal man, strong, brave (the great spider slayer), smart, handsome (this became a problem with my friends in high school) and very funny! I measure every man that enters my life against my father. I have yet to meet one who measures up. I love you Daddy. Love your Peachy Fry

The Old Waterin Hole....With A New Age Attitude

2007-06-25T11:49:00.000-07:00

I can remember when I was a child and my Uncle would take me up to his favorite little bar with him. I loved the smell of stale beer and cigarettes, peanuts on the floor and every old timer in there wanted to hand me a dollar or two. It was a tiny place where everybody knew everyone else by name and you felt safe.

Nowadays these little gems are few and far between. In a world overrun by large, corporate owed bars that are the size of football stadiums, finding a hole in the wall waterin hole is considered a real accomplishment. These are not for the meat-seekers, that is, those who are out looking to get laid. These are not for the men who want to act like cavemen and fight to prove their prowess. And they are not for the women looking to have drinks bought for them all night long.

An old waterin hole is where you go to talk to friends, shoot pool, relax and avoid the social interactions forced upon you at the larger bars. Do we have a good time...yes. Do we get a little crazy on a Friday night...hell yes! The difference being that we know everyone we are with, we know that no one will try to take advantage of us and that someone will drive us home at the end of the night if we need. Fights almost never happen unless an outsider enters and is rude or inconsiderate.

The days of old have shifted slightly though in the case of women in the bars. When my Uncle would take me you would rarely see a woman there, muchless a group of women unless there were men there with them. But times have changed and women have invaded man's secret hiding place and in some cases even taken them over (although we are always willing to share).

In the end I will take my little home away from home and keep it safe from the invasion of the meat-seekers and cavemen of the corporate bars. It's mine I say and you can't have it. I just hope there are still some left when my children are old enough to enjoy them.

~Darlin~

Children and Porn

2007-06-25T11:04:00.000-07:00

This weekend when I was sittin at the pool with the kids my daughter's boyfriend's mom came down and we started talking. She asked me not judge her and revealed to me that since her son has been very curious about sex lately and is apparently bombarding her with questions she decided to let him watch a porn video. HE IS 12!!!

Forget not judging her...IS SHE CRAZY?? Am I being judgemental to say that her son is no longer allowed to date my daughter? Because that was the first thing I did say. I have had two daughters asking me about sex since they were about 8 years old and never once did I think, "I'll just slap in a porno and hope that explains it."

I consider myself a pretty open minded mom, but to allow a 12 year-old child to view porn to me is lunacy. What happened to parents actually talking to their children? I continually talk to my daughters, and now my son about sex, dating and everything else they get shoved in their faces on a daily basis. But we talk...they are allowed to ask any question they want and I am proud to day that they feel comfortable enough to ask some pretty...um... shall we say "adult" questions. Here are some examples:

"What is a donkey show?"

"Mom why would a girl want to suck on a boy's d*ck?"

"How come if boobies are for babies to eat boys always go crazy over them?"

"What is masturbation?"

"Why would someone masturbate?"

"Why do people have sex like dogs?" (after hearing something about doggie-style)

These are just a few but I hope it shows how comfortable my children are with talking to me about these types of things. I just cannot comprehend answering these questions by handing my child a porn tape, lotion and a towel (in a boy's case).

If I am being closed minded here I would love to hear it but I will stick by my opinion that this is just bad, lazy parenting.

~Darlin~

A Child's First "Break-Up"

2007-06-11T12:40:00.000-07:00

My twelve year-old had her first boyfriend this year. This is a boy she goes to school with, in the same grade and he lives very close to us. I am friends with his mother and after several lectures and threats the guidelines to this infant relationship were set.

Two short months later my daughter and I start to hear from other children that her boyfriend is telling them that he is going to break-up with her. The next time I saw the boy I asked him if this was true. He smiled a cocky little smile and said, "Yes".

"When were you going to tell her?". I asked

"When I get to it.", he replied.

"Consider it gotten to!", I barked.

So I talk to my daughter thinking (like an idiot) that this will not phase her but the second the words left my mouth I could see her beautiful little heart sink. I could see her fighting to keep the tears back and it ripped my heart out. I put my arms around her and told her how sorry I was. I also told her that it was not my place to end her relationship and that perhaps she should talk to him and find out what was happening.

She did and he apologized to her and to me. He said that the other kids were giving him a hard time and he just wanted to shut them up. I again told my daughter that what she did was up to her and to my dismay (which I kept to myself) she gave him a second chance.

My heart swelled with pride and I realized just how much my daughter listened to me when , while having my ear plastered to the other side of the front door, I heard her tell him, "If you ever disrespect me like that again I'll replace you with someone bigger, stronger and way better looking!"

So in the end I guess things worked out but I will never forget the rage and helplessness I felt when I saw the hurt in my little girl's eyes and for the first time I truly realized that I can't fix all the problems and I can't keep them safe from all the pain. All I can do is be there to listen and give them my lap to cry in while I plan the torture and dismemberment of whomever caused it (secretly of course). ;-)

Two Wheels and the Women On Them

2007-05-30T10:03:00.000-07:00

Draggin a brush through your hair after a two hour ride that you forgot to tie your hair up for, bugs in your teeth, layers of road grime on your skin and a horrid sunburn because you forgot your sunscreen...AGAIN! Why would I put myself through this? FREEDOM!

The feeling of freedom that one can only achieve through straddling 700+ pounds of chrome and steel and racing headlong into a sunset. The freedom of never having to wrap my arms around someone and hoping that they don't kill me before we get where we are going. And especially the freedom of knowing that I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.

The next time you are stopped at a red light and you hear the deep growl of a motorcycle engine close by, stop, take a look around and don't be surprised to discover that the person controlling that mean machine is a woman. The number of women riders is on the rise and rising quickly. Women have discovered the joy of no restraints, no boundaries and no one telling them motorcycles are for men. They are stealing their boyfriend's/husband's or buying their own that makes their significant other's look like last year's tricycle.

There is an element of pure joy that comes from knowing you can control that beast between your legs and probably better than most men. Women are naturally more cautious and therefore safer riders. Being a female riders makes you feel strong, empowered and unique. I always encourage women to take up riding. The comment I hear the most is, "I could never ride a motorcycle. I wouldn't know what to do and they are so big!" My response, "Can you ride a bicycle?"

Riding a motorcycle is intimidating to most women because they are large and loud. I will not tell you that weight is not an issue. It definitely is. My first bike weighed over 750 pounds with a full tank of gas and if it wanted to fall you can bet I was not going to be able to stop it. There are more lightweight bikes available though and you do have to consider your own size versus the size of the bike you are riding.

Be smart. Take a riders safety course. They are offered all over the nation and most offer classes just for women. They start you out assuming you have never even sat on a motorcycle, much less ridden one. They teach you everything you need to know about the bike and yourself when you are on that bike.

I hope that I have at least tempted a few of you females out there to consider this. If you do and you end up riding PLEASE contact me. Tell me your story and send me your pics. I would love to hear from anyone.

~Darlin~